A Little Down

Lately I've been feeling a little down in the dumps. I really have no reason to. I bought a new (to me) car, which I looooove. Things have been going extremely well at work and at home. I am unsure what brings on these emo times. But I am truly sick of it. Because when I get this way, I eat. Cry and eat. So I have gained some weight. I am at 197 today. Depressing. Almost back to 200 lbs. Which causes me more sadness.

Normal people do not eat when they get sad, or do they? I have a toxic relationship with food. I bought a box of cookies and ate them all but 2. I kept going in the kitchen to get another and another and another until they were gone. I am so disappointed in myself, yet I keep going down this route.


Anyone else feel like this? 

Let's Jump on the Bandwagon...

So I am trying out Herbalife for a couple of weeks just to get a feel if i actually am about that life... ya know two replacement meal shakes a day... I am a oral person (lolz) so drinking my meals just does not seem like it would be a good idea for me. But who knows. I had my morning shake and added some light strawberry banana yogurt to it since it was so disgusting. And I wasn't even able to drink the full shake since I am full. Which is awesome! I will have a salad for lunch and the other half of my shake for dinner.

Lets see how this Herbalife thing goes, I have seen some awesome results and my mom's friend only works out once a week and she looks amazing. Im going to need some prayers!
XOXO
E

Lunch & Snacks

I'd love to have a sandwich, but most of the time, bread is a HUGE no no because it gets stuck. And we all know what stuck episodes do. >___< They do not feel good in the least bit. So I have been eating turkey meat with avocado. Oh My Goodness! It is sooo yummy! But is it good for you? I know avocado is supposed to be a good fat... If i could eat this every single day for lunch I would. They looked very similar to the picture below I stole off the net lol (minus the green olives and veggies, I had a peach)

What are some of your easy lunch time foods that you eat while at work?

11 Weeks...

Wow, has it already been 11 weeks since I've had the lapband done?! Time is flying by..I am at 40 lbs gone as of right now. Cool. I want more. As Josh would say, I dont want to be ordinary i want to be great! LOL So im hitting the gym tonight with my new gym buddy Lily, her son Max is on Kavika's baseball team! It's so great to meet other parents with similar interests. I have been kind of slacking on measuring my food lately. :( So i gotta get back on that. Although i do not think i over eat, i would like to see exactly how much i am eating.

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Damn im always slacking on finishing my blogs, that was started 4/6. Anyway im just sending "as is" lol

Ehhh

So my stomach looks so much better, no redness or anything. I am going to assume i get my first fill on the 22nd. 9 weeks from my surgery date! Man this has been a long 9 weeks. I am down about 35 lbs now from my scale. I havent seen this weight since I had Kianna. 0_o. I often ask myself, HOW did i let this happen?! Why did i allow myself to get so dang fat. smh. But i really dont have a response to it. I would always say, Yah im fat but im cute so it dont matter! Yes, it does matter cus although I am not unattractive, my mind was! Inside i was miserable. And you could tell by my attitude. I see myself differently now. I may not be anywhere near my goal weight, but I already feel different inside. Anyway when i first had the surgery I was a size 22, I am now fitting into a Forever 21 size 16. I am unsure if those run big or what, but a SIXTEEN!!! woo hoo! Now dont get me wrong, if there isnt any stretch, i cant fit into a 16 lol Probably an 18. But whatever I have a pair of size 16 pants on now *takes a bow*
I miss my friends. I feel kinda lonely. My bestie is in Vegas, and i havent spoken much to any other friends here. So tonight I have decided to take my butt out! I havent gone out since New years eve. I dont count Vegas cus really, i was still recovering and my butt should have been home anyway lol. Most of my clothes are way too big so I gotta figure out what I am gonna wear out. :/ And do I have one drink or not. I havent had a drink since before my surgery so I do not know how it will affect me. I am kinda scared.
Anyway gotta get back to work
XOXO
E

38 Days

So its only 38 days until my surgery! I am super excited yet nervous! Like how do you prepare to have the lapband? Only 12 more days til i go to the one on one with the doctor. I cant believe this is finally happening for me. I am not even sure on what to say right now. I just thought since I havent blogged nearly as much as I have wanted to I should post something. My eating habits lately have been horrible - Shame on me for not eating better. I need more veggies in my diet. I shall go to get some today after work. I have so much going on in my life right now. Surgery coming, Birthday coming, school starting. How am I ever going to keep up with all of this? I know, God will lead me on the right path. This is actually the happiest I have been in a long while. I am feeling motivated. Like Yes, I can do this. Sure it wont be easy, but really is anything ever easy in my life? I am already planning my one year visit to ATL for after my surgery. I sure do wish Miya took appts hella far in advance cus i sure would book him for jan 2012 lmao.
Anyway, I am unsure of what types of protein shakes I should buy, well cus i know they are going to be nasty and chalky. :( I need to get out my folder and start looking at my notes i wrote in my classes. I better get back to work. lol - i have added a pic of me from this morning..

XOXO

E