LilySlim Weight loss tickers

LilySlim Weight loss tickers

Sunday, September 18, 2011

My Crazy Thoughts...

Im not even sure how to start this one off. I have so many issues that may be holding me back. First let me just say, i am so glad I have lost as much weight as I have since having the Lapband done in January. That being said, I feel like i should be so much farther along in my weight loss. And maybe I would be if I worked out. Right now, i just walk. And sure walking should help but yah... anyway, in a perfect world i would look in the mirror and say, Damn Erica, you look GOOD! but in MY world, i see the same fat girl i did 8 months ago. I only really notice the loss in pictures of me. I think oh wow, i look small here - and that should be the end of that, but its not. I end the sentence with, but my belly is still big! *sigh*
I am only writing this because I know I am not the only one feeling this way. So i looked in the mirror after getting out of the shower today and started to cry. My stomach is less than flattering. Nothing else bothers me to be honest, my stomach is just ugh! So I get dressed, i wear a navy blue shirt in an Juniors XL (i havent fit this size since I had my oldest 13 years ago) and some jeggings (yes i said jeggings). I see myself and i think UGH. Then i snap a couple of pics and i say heyyyy I look good... Its amazing how the mirror and pictures differ in someones eyes. But at the end of the day, what I look at is the mirror. How can I change the negative thoughts I have when i see myself. Everyone in the world can tell me "you look great" "wow" etc but what I see isnt the same as what they see....

So these are the pics that I am speaking of:

Front View 9-18-11

Side View 9-18-11
And a before picture for comparison:
Not a very good pic but you can see i was much bigger...

1 comment:

  1. I don't get it .. why are we so hard on ourselves ... you have lost a LOT of weight ... you look so different ... embrace your hard work ... now, go do it ! :)